I will not be reading:
1. Exploitative books by anyone with the surname of Bush. Except if it’s a travel guide about club-hopping and buying blow in Paraguay. Something the author really KNOWS about. I smell Judith Regan in this book deal…
2. The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. I won’t be watching the DVD, either. ‘Cos the real secret to everything is: Get Oprah to talk about it.
3. Anything containing the words “Harry Potter.” I once dated a guy who too closely resembled Harry Potter. And I once wore polyester mini-dresses. No sense revisiting the ugly past.
4. The Reagan Diaries. I really never want to get into this guy’s head, thank you very much.
5. Understanding Philosophy Through Jokes. One of the blurbs for this book reads: “What do Hegel and Bette Midler have in common?” What’s next? Understanding Classical Music through Britney Spears?